The Ultimate Historical Catfish

Before the invention of photography, royalty and leaders had to rely on painters to broadcast their image across the world. Unsurprisingly, these court artists knew exactly who signed their paychecks and rarely painted a realistic portrait. Most famous leaders had severe physical imperfections, facial asymmetry, or dental issues that were completely erased from their official images.

Unknown authorUnknown author on Wikimedia

1. Cleopatra

The legendary queen of Egypt is usually shown in modern media and Renaissance art as a flawless, striking beauty who captivated empires with her looks. When you check out the actual profile stamped onto ancient coins from her reign, she features a sharply hooked nose, a prominent chin, and a much thinner mouth. Historians note that her true power lay in her brilliant intellect and political savvy.

Fox Film Corporation on Wikimedia

2. Richard III

Painters of the Tudor dynasty consistently exaggerated Richard III’s facial features for centuries. Modern forensic teams completely overturned this propaganda when they discovered his skeletal remains underneath a parking lot. The 3D facial reconstruction revealed a surprisingly pleasant, mild-featured young man with no facial deformities at all.

Unknown authorUnknown author on Wikimedia

3. George Washington

Gilbert Stuart's famous painting of America's first president shows a stern man with perfectly smooth skin and a dignified, full jawline. In reality, Washington suffered from terrible dental health that left him with a single remaining natural tooth by the time he took office. His dentures were crafted from a clumsy mix of cow teeth, hippopotamus ivory, and lead.

John Trumbull on Wikimedia

4. Maximilien Robespierre

Paintings of the French revolutionary depict him as clean-cut and neat beyond comparison. Scientists who studied his mask, however, saw tell-tale signs of a disease suffered during his youth. Robespierre was scarred with pockmarks from having contracted smallpox as a child.

Unidentified painter on Wikimedia

5. King Tutankhamun

The spectacular golden burial mask of this boy pharaoh presents an image of symmetrical perfection, youth, and immense physical strength. Virtual autopsies using over two thousand CT scans showed that the real king struggled with severe physical ailments. He possessed a pronounced overbite and a club foot that forced him to walk with canes.

Jon Bodsworth on Wikimedia

6. Queen Elizabeth I

English painters created the "Mask of Youth" portrait style to keep the Virgin Queen looking eternally young, radiant, and divine to her subjects. The actual queen suffered a devastating bout of smallpox that left her facial skin permanently scarred and hairless. She covered these deep imperfections with a thick, toxic layer of white lead paste.

Unidentified painter on Wikimedia

7. Alexander the Great

Magnificent statues found all over Europe show Alexander as the epitome of a Greek god. Contemporary accounts written by his close friends reveal that Alexander was actually quite short, even by ancient Greek standards. He also had a noticeable physical quirk where his head permanently tilted slightly upward and toward his left shoulder.

Yair Haklai on Wikimedia

8. Napoleon Bonaparte

British cartoonists spent years drawing the French emperor as a microscopic, angry little man to mock his military ambitions in the newspapers. This propaganda campaign was so successful that it created a lasting myth about his height that persists to this day. Napoleon actually stood at roughly five feet and six inches, which was completely average for a Frenchman during the early nineteenth century.

Andrea Appiani on Wikimedia

9. Julius Caesar

The smooth marble busts in global museums usually depict the Roman dictator with a perfectly rounded head and thick, luscious hair brushed forward. Suetonius wrote that Caesar desperately hated going bald and used to pull his remaining hair over his crown to hide it. Forensic studies also suggest that his head was oddly elongated and deformed due to craniosynostosis at birth.

TorinoDoc on Wikimedia

10. Louis XIV

In his artwork, Louis XIV is portrayed as standing with confidence and well-toned legs. He was actually barely five feet tall and used three-inch heels and voluminous wigs to overpower others. His invasive dental procedure left him with a hole in the roof of his mouth.

anonymous  on Wikimedia

11. Emperor Nero

Romanticized paintings and films remember Nero as an awkward thinker with dark hair and smoldering eyes. In contrast, the Roman emperor was described by Suetonius as chubby, with skinny legs and blonde hair. Nero didn’t bother to bathe regularly and was known to wear unstiffened dinner robes.

cjh1452000 on Wikimedia

12. Abraham Lincoln

Lincoln's photographs and paintings have been modified over time to soften his rough edges. His uneven face and coarse skin made him uniquely odd-looking. One side of his face was significantly smaller than the other, making his left eye sit noticeably higher than his right.

Alexander Gardner on Wikimedia

13. King Henry VIII

Holbein's famous portrait shows the Tudor monarch as a mountain of a man with broad shoulders, immense strength, and complete physical dominance. While he was athletic in his youth, a severe jousting accident in his forties left him with ulcerated legs that never healed. He became largely immobile and developed a waistline that eventually measured an astounding fifty-four inches.

Hans Holbein the Younger on Wikimedia

14. Simon Bolivar

The great liberator of South America is preserved in grand oil paintings as a tall, muscular hero with a rich complexion and robust health. The physical descriptions written by his personal physician paint a much more fragile picture of the military commander. He was quite small, weighing barely a hundred and thirty pounds.

Ricardo Acevedo Bernal on Wikimedia

15. Queen Victoria

Queen Victoria is never seen in portraits without looking thin or taller than she was. In reality, Queen Victoria grew wider as she ate her way through grief. Few images of the queen exist that show her actual figure.

John Jabez Edwin Mayall on Wikimedia

16. Emperor Charles V

Paintings of Charles V were commissioned by the Emperor himself and painted by renowned artist Titian. Charles V suffered from what is now known as the Habsburg jaw. His bottom row of teeth extended far beyond his top row, causing him to have a severe underbite.

Lucas Cranach the Elder on Wikimedia

17. William Shakespeare

The Chandos portrait is one of the most famous images of Shakespeare. But did Shakespeare actually look like this? The Droeshout engraving printed on the First Folio, which his actual friends approved, shows a completely different man. That version features a notably massive forehead, a patchy beard, and a rapidly receding hairline.

Attributed to John Taylor on Wikimedia

18. Jane Austen

The most popular watercolor of the beloved author shows a bright-eyed, soft-featured woman sitting peacefully in a stylish bonnet. Her own family members openly complained about this picture. They stated that it looked absolutely nothing like the real Jane.

Cassandra Austen on Wikimedia

19. Benjamin Franklin

The portraits we see on money and canvas show a kindly, portly grandfather with smooth skin and flowing silver locks. Franklin was an avid swimmer who spent his youth lifting heavy boxes, leaving him with an incredibly muscular and broad-shouldered frame. He also developed severe gout later in life that forced him to walk with a heavy limp and altered his posture.

After Joseph-Siffred Duplessis on Wikimedia

20. Joan of Arc

Renaissance artwork frequently depicts the French heroine as a tall, flowing-haired beauty wearing gleaming silver armor like a mythical goddess. Fifteenth-century records indicate she was actually a short, muscular peasant girl with tanned skin from working out in the fields. She cut her dark hair into a practical, short bowl cut like a common male soldier to fit into her armor.

John Everett Millais on Wikimedia